Anything They Can Do
by saphire2moon
Summary: On shore-leave at Chora's Den, Kaiden gets himself in a little trouble with the slighlty drunk Commander. It seems the Spectre needs to teach her subordinate a little lesson. No true bondage or beating, just smut. M for a reason, i think. RXR!


A.N: A small M rated FemShepardxAlenko that took me forever to write but am happy I wrote. You don't have to like it or not, but read and review.

Anything They Can Do

Shepard didn't understand what was so great about them. Sure they had a way of moving their bodies. And sure they could get into people's heads and move just the way the watchers wanted them to. But she just didn't get it. With a toss of her head, Sarah Shepard downed yet another shot of her drink. Beside her an every watching Asari woman kept her eyes on the glass as it slammed a little too hard on the counter top. "Commander, if I may speak freely." Sarah grumbled and turned her head slightly to look at the Asari. "We're off duty aren't we? You can speak freely anytime you damn well like." Liara gulped slightly. Normally, the Commander was a controlled person, one who respected people and in kind was given respect. However, it seemed that after a few heavy styled drinks the Commander's sense of respect could be thrown out the window. "Well, you seem a little troubled. I was simply wondering if you needed assistance in something." It seemed like the right thing to say at the time that was until Shepard turned to glare at her. "Don't need some damn Asari poking into my head. Why don't you just drink and go talk to Wrex about feelings. I'll be damned if the guy doesn't need it." Liara, fearful to instigate some sort of wrath of Shepard, quickly nodded before wrenching herself over to the Krogan at the other end of the bar, leaving Shepard to brood at the corner dancer's stage in peace. Damn if she hadn't slept with that man. Grumbling, she reached over and grasped at another drink. Her normal morals usual limited her to only two drinks per night- reason being that she liked to be alert of her surroundings- but tonight was different. By God, if that Asari dancer didn't stop rubbing herself over him she was going to fire a bullet straight into the fray. And he liked it; she could just see the smile on his ever so handsome face. "'Make me feel human,' He says. Ha! I should show him what it would feel like to be human." Sarah downed her drink once more before turning fully to the corner. Her face screwed up into a sickened little grimace. "She has no style. Why do men enjoy that? Hell, why would anyone enjoy that?"

While the ever reliable Shepard brooded at the bar, a certain biotics expert was trying his damn hardest not to move. He appreciated the show and-being a man- couldn't help but feel turned on by it, but he had a commitment. At least he thought it was a commitment. Seeing as he and the Commander hadn't actually had anything that was remotely close to sex since the battle against Saren and the Reapers, he didn't know what he and the Human Spectre had going on. He liked her. Hell, he was close to believing he loved his superior. He admired her courage, her bravery, her smarts, her charm, and her kindness. Alright, he loved her body too, but who wouldn't. The woman was packed! All curves and muscle, with all those sexy scars that scattered her body here and there and her beautiful breasts and pale skin… "Damn it, Alenko! Not helping the situation!" The Asari dancer gave him one confused look before shrugging and going straight back to her dance. He wasn't the first to admit that the Asari were very erotic dancers, and he wouldn't lie and say he had never been to see a consort before, but again he was just a tiny bit into a certain Commander for the Alliance. Without alerting the Asari, who probably wouldn't care either way, he looked over to glance at the object of his thoughts. There she sat, her head ducked down into her drink, chin length blonde hair mussed, and eyes as blue as the Earth sky. Her forehead was furrowed into a frown that only brought out the scar that graced her right eyebrow. He noticed that her pink lips were pursed together making the tiny cut on the corner edge disappear. "Shit," Kaiden whispered softly as his erection pressed even fuller against his uniform.

Sarah Shepard was patient. She was also observant and careful. People commonly referred to her as headstrong and willing to fight. These were qualities that had helped her throughout her career and also helped her survive not only to slaughter on Akuze, but the slums of Earth. She also knew what a damn erection looked like in a man's pants. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of the bulge in her Lieutenant's trousers. Some Asari was not going to be happy when she got her hands on the alien. Shepard stood very carefully trying to keep her waves of anger from bouncing into unsuspecting civilians. With a soft hand, she resisted the urge to draw her weapon and walked slowly over to the dancer's stage. The Asari didn't notice the woman, or she might have realized that she was in dangerous territory and would have run for cover. Sadly, she was only too preoccupied with the man in front of her. With a quick shift of her feet, the dancer was off the floor and unto the stage once more. Luckily for her, Shepard took this move as a symbol of peace and space between her and the biotics soldier. When her feet, wobbly at best due to the contained alcohol, finally reached the side of the chair her target sat at, she bent forward to look at him. Kaiden turned to suddenly see Shepard inches from his face. He smiled shyly, hoping she wouldn't take any of this the wrong way and gestured with his drink. "Hey, Commander." Sarah twitched visibly and her face grew more intense. His gorgeous face grinned again and nodded. His eyes showed all innocence, but she wasn't fooled for a minute. His uniform, which being on temporary leave consisted of the outfit commonly worn on deck, did nothing to hide his arm muscles and tight chest. Sarah felt the beginnings of heat crawl its way towards her center and the warmth of her skin set fire to her senses. She reached behind her and grabbed the nearest chair, sliding it painfully across the floor, causing a few drunken persons to curse at her. Settled in the seat, Shepard plopped her arms behind her head and stared at the dancer. The Asari, thinking she would be entertaining two observers now, tried her best to put on a good show.

Kaiden rubbed the rim of his drink nervously. His Commander's temper was extreme when she needed it. He cursed inside his head. The sudden smell that infiltrated his nostrils was coming from her no doubt. That fine scent of rich mint and sweet lavender. His groin stretched painfully against his pants and he prayed she wouldn't see it. He crossed his legs in a last effort to hide it, but only succeeded in causing spikes of thrill up his middle from the rough texture of his pants. With a simple glance at Shepard he saw her attention was not on him, but on the dancer. Interesting to say the least, for he thought she had no interest in these sorts of activities. Shepard seemed to be…thinking? 'Why is she thinking about the dancer? Is something wrong?' Kaiden looked over her face for some trace of information, but like always she was unreadable. He was opening his mouth to speak when she spoke. "I can dance better than she can." Whatever he had planned to say made a definite "Whoosh" sound as it came out of his mouth. The Asari stopped as well, most definitely confused by the woman's words. Shepard turned her head to Kaiden and gave a 'no shit' look. Kaiden sat speechless. He had thought she would have said something along the lines of, "This isn't proper for a soldier" or "You're a pig, Alenko." No, the thing that she says is "that"! Shepard bit her bottom lip before nodding in confirmation. "Yep, pretty sure I can dance better than she can." Kaiden found his tongue in the minute of silence as his response came out a confused, "What?" Shepard turned and smiled. It was at that moment that Kaiden realized that his superior was drunk; stupidly and angrily drunk. "Huh?" Shepard stood in a drunken manner and turned away. When she was only a few feet away, she looked over her shoulder. "Alenko, follow me." Kaiden, still confused, nodded dumbly and stood. He trailed after her like a trained puppy. When they both disappeared through the exit, the only thing left of them being there were two chairs and a dumbfounded Asari.

Kaiden had expected his Commander to be mad at him, but this was just ridiculous. He tugged again at the ropes binding his arms to the back of the chair, but they held firm. He was going to have to remember to ask Shepard where she learned to tie such invincible ropes. His situation did not call for that at the time. He was bound to a chair, butt-naked, sitting in the middle of Shepard's room. The ship had been silent when they had boarded, all its crew taking their vacations. He could say he hadn't seen the knock-out coming. Being trained as he was in combat and all kinds of special hand-to-hand training, he should have seen the punch in the face. He twisted his tongue on his front tooth, pleased to find he had all of his necessary teeth intact. Now, he just needed to find out why he was tied to a chair…naked. The room was quiet except for his breathing. He moved to the right and hissed silently. His erection had refused to cool down since leaving Chora's Den and had grown at the thought of getting it on with his Commander once again. It hurt like hell, and was starting to annoy him. "Shepard?" His call echoed slightly, before the door slid open. The light from the hall blinded him for an instant, before it disappeared. The only light was now the glow from the computer screen. He was a sudden feeling of very mixed up Déjà vu as Shepard swaggered her way over to him. Although she was in fact naked. Kaiden wiggled against the ropes once more before talking. "What's going on Shepard? Why am I tied up?" Shepard's smile turned alluring and almost cat-like as she slid her way over to the bed in the corner. "I don't know Alenko? Why don't you tell me?" Kaiden had about enough of his superior's games. "Shepard, let me go." Sarah stood and walked over to stand in front of him. "Haven't you ever seen an Earth video before? This is the part where the captive asks to be let free and the captor asks, 'What will you give me for your freedom?'" Kaiden felt a shiver of pleasure shoot up his spine. His breathing was abnormal and he was damn near collapsing. "Let me go, sir. Please," he added as an afterthought. Shepard bent forward and placed her hands on either side of his thighs, causing Kaiden to whimper. She smiled again and leaned in. "I will free you, Alenko. But only if you give me one thing in return." Kaiden strained against the ropes tying him to the chair in an effort to taste the deliciously close lips of Sarah Shepard. "What?"

Sarah sighed and leaned forward to touch his lips. Kaiden's body flared violently and he strained painfully against the back of the chair. Shepard pulled away despite how much she wanted to move in. He tasted incredible; like he did the first night they made love. In the spur of that moment, they had told each other their deepest feelings about one another. Or at least, he had. Kaiden gasped and tugged. "Sarah, let me go!" Sarah blinked, for it always surprised her when Kaiden called her by her first name. The way he said it made her tremble with desire. "Really, Alenko? You want me to let you go?" He nodded once a determined set in his face. Sarah rotated around the chair tapping her finger to her chin in mock thought. "It seems to me like your little friend likes the treatment I'm giving him." Kaiden hissed out a curse as Sarah rounded the chair and leaned to flick at his groin. "He doesn't know what the hell he wants." Sarah halted her actions and looked up at Kaiden's sweating face. "Does he really?" Kaiden felt the walls close in. Since when did Shepard's eyes look so sad? He opened his mouth to answer when her lips came crashing back down on his. He forgot his apology and just let himself and her be swept away. Their tongues dueled a brief moment before Shepard took control and lifted a hand to trace over Kaiden's chest. He hissed in the kiss and squirmed. Sarah pulled away to pat Kaiden on the head and turn around. Kaiden felt his heart beat much too loudly for his chest. He had to be careful or his biotic powers might get out of hand and zap her or him. His head was already pounding what with the torture and the uncontained heat.

Sarah sighed and turned to look at her captive again. Her thoughts might have been slightly altered but she damn well knew when to keep a straight head. What the hell was she trying to prove? Oh, yeah! She was trying to prove that she could dance better than an Asari. "You know," Kaiden said stiffly. "I was thinking of you the whole time." He watched as Shepard turned to stare at him. She seemed more like herself for the moment. Her eyes reflected regret for an instant before slight peace rested in them. "I was just pissed you know. That's why I punched you." Shepard walked over and gently let her hands trail down his face on what he knew would be a fresh bruise. "Sorry."

Kaiden tugged at the ropes again. Gods he wanted to kiss her, and hug her, and hold her, and have crazed sex with her! He tugged again. He felt the deep need to explain. Obviously, looking at the Asari dancer seemed to have bugged her more than he thought. "I really was thinking of you. Mostly I wished that I could spend the evening having time and sex with you and not hanging in a bar." Sarah smiled. He was so cute when he was embarrassed. Feeling flirtatious again, she pulled herself over to him and sat carefully; on his lap. He growled loudly and Sarah found she enjoyed the sound a lot. He was an amazing crewmate that held an inner fire not yet explored. Well, time to go exploring. "So," she drawled missing his erection completely as she got herself comfortable. Not that the thing was easy to miss, the little soldier was kind of standing at attention. He huffed out a "what?" and groaned when Sarah adjusted. "You weren't thinking about me dancing for you." Kaiden looked up with a look of heat that would burn a sun to a crisp. "The thought crossed my mind a time or two." Sarah looked down and took pity. "Well, Kaiden, I have a special dance just for you." So saying, Sarah lifted herself up and gently lowered his erection unto her sex. She groaned in accordance with his and felt him thrust up against the chair. Sarah pushed her fists into his shoulders to find some leverage and fell down again. Kaiden growled low in his throat. "Damn Commander, do something with these damn ropes! I have to touch you!" She had enough in her to smirk and shook her head. "No, this is for even looking at the asari; even if you were thinking of me." Kaiden growled and twisted. The movement caused Sarah to gasp and wiggle to get into a comfortable position. Then she lifted herself again and picked up a movement.

It was fast, almost faster than the first time they had been together. Kaiden mumbled something under his breath from time to time, and Sarah tried to bite back her moans. Not that it mattered seeing as the entire crew was on shore. It just seemed too private for even the confines of the ship to hear. They thrust faster, Sarah doing most of the work while Kaiden groaned and encouraged with upwards thrusts. Sarah felt a tight ball of heat gather with the coil that had anchored itself in her gut and pushed harder. Kaiden felt her tense before adding a twist to his thrust and feeling immense satisfaction when his commander yelped and moaned in response. Then she screamed as her climax tore through both of them. Kaiden thrust once more before joining her in the bliss that had haunted them since the time before.

When they both had stopped moving to catch their breaths, Sarah rested her head on his shoulder. Kaiden stared at her short blonde hair and pale neck a moment before closing his eyes in contentment. That headache that had been following him around was finally gone. He smiled and bent down to kiss her shoulder. She shifted and he felt the ropes give way and finally drop with an audible thud to the floor. He took what little strength he had and wrapped his arms around her waist. She simply mumbled against his shoulder and hugged him tighter. "What did you say, Commander?" Sarah lifted her head enough to stare at his neck. "I said, 'We should move to the bed'."

"Oh, right." Seconds passed but neither of them moved. "Commander?" She shifted her hand to pat his shoulder, which was still covered in sweat. "I was kind of hoping you would carry me Lieutenant." He laughed softly and helped her pull out of him. She sighed and aided him in standing with her. A couple steps, and some grappling, led them to her bunk and spread contently on the blue sheets. They simply lay there. Sarah's eyes were closed, whether from the exercise or the drinking, Kaiden had no idea, but she looked so vulnerable laying there. He rarely got to see this side of his sexy commander, so he could only watch as she drifted. He brushed a hand over her brow and kissed her temple. She opened her blue eyes at him and sent his romantic heart, the one he claimed not to have, a flutter. "Just so you know I'm still mad at you Alenko." Too tired to argue, he simply smiled. "Truthfully, Shepard, you have nothing to worry about. My heart belongs to you." She stared at him and like the first time, she wasn't entirely sure what to say. "You put a lot of trust in me Alenko." He nodded and wrapped an arm around her. "Don't think about it, it'll give you a headache. Let's just sleep for now." She nodded and closed her eyes again. Kaiden had a sudden thought. "What you meant earlier," he began. She mumbled in response. "Were you trying to prove you could dance better than an asari?" Sarah Shepard opened her eyes again to glance at Kaiden Alenko and smiled.

"Hey, anything they can do, I can do better."

A.N: Okay, not too horrible right. I put some effort into making this. It was just a quick oneshot to help cure my fabled writer's block. I think it might have worked. Please read and review. Please keep the flames to a minimum; I burn easily, never tan.


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